Monday, September 21, 2009

More fun with Dan Brown

The release of Dan Brown's new book (which Dr. Swift will borrow from the Circulating Library when next in need of laughing very hard) has allowed a small current of dissent to surface--finally, people are realising that actually:



Dan Brown isn't all that good.



Even in the hand of a Dostoyevsky, an Austen, or an Evelyn Waugh, the mediocre pap that was the Da Vinci Code would have been thin. In the hands of Dan Brown, it's a train wreck.

Our friends at the Daily Telegraph have itemised the 20 worst sentences in Dan Brown's books--and they are very entertaining.

Favourites follow:

8. The Da Vinci Code, chapter 3: My French stinks, Langdon thought, but my zodiac iconography is pretty good.

(Qualifications to opine on Medieval and religious history: Tarot cards. Check.)

2. Angels and Demons, opening sentence: Physicist Leonardo Vetra smelled burning flesh, and he knew it was his own.

(I knew I could smell something burning.)

15. The Da Vinci Code, chapter 4: As a boy, Langdon had fallen down an abandoned well shaft and almost died treading water in the narrow space for hours before being rescued. Since then, he'd suffered a haunting phobia of enclosed spaces - elevators, subways, squash courts.

(NOooo! Not the SQUASH COURT!)

Much more entertainment available at the link.

When you're finished there, you can read Anthony Lane's review of The Da Vinci Code film and book.

As far as I am qualified to judge, the film remains unswervingly loyal to the book, displaying an obedience that Silas could not hope to match. I welcome this fidelity, because it allows us to propose a syllogism. The movie is baloney; the movie is an accurate representation of the book; therefore, the book is also baloney, although it takes even longer to consume.\

Yep. Pretty much.

Hat tip: MCJ

2 comments:

Dani said...

Hahahahahahahahahahahaha

To be fair, he's a good read on the airplane, so long as I can stifle my feminist rage that all the female character leads are

a) identical
b) identically stupid
c) spend the entire book being preached to by a man

Jeremy said...

Hmmm..Dani, I thought you of all people would be perfectly happy for women to be preached to by men. Or is your problem that it's not celibate men?